Fewer homeless families now: MSF

Fewer homeless families are being picked up by the authorities. Last year, 93 families were admitted to shelters, compared with 144 in 2013.

In contrast, 71 homeless individuals moved into transitional shelters, compared with 49 in 2013. Another 105 were sent to welfare homes last year.

The Ministry of Social and Family Development (MSF) said there are fewer homeless families now, as efforts have been made in recent years to ensure those in financial and housing difficulties are referred early to family service centres (FSCs) for help.

Associate Professor Irene Ng, from the National University of Singapore’s (NUS) social work department, said households have also benefited from adjustments to housing policy.

“In the past, the problem of homeless families was partly due to some overstretching themselves to own a flat and having to sell it when in financial difficulty,” said Prof Ng.

“This issue is being addressed with refinements in HDB criteria as well as the development of interim rental housing for families.”

NUS sociologist Tan Ern Ser agreed that families have more housing options now.

“Perhaps family units are more likely to be given priority with rental housing,” he said.

“Also, they may be less choosy when offered shelter or interim housing, as this would be in the best interest of young children.”

There are three government- funded shelters that allow people to stay for up to six months for as low as $50 a month.

Places in these shelters – which can accommodate about 150 families – are reserved for those who have exhausted all means of accommodation and need immediate housing assistance, said MSF.

Those who do not qualify or cannot wait for a place in a shelter can apply for the Housing Board’s interim rental scheme, which costs about a few hundred dollars a month for a room. They can also try to rent on the open market.

Homeless individuals tend to be older, have health conditions and lack any means of supporting themselves or their families.

They are often admitted to welfare homes, said MSF.

To help homeless people, the Government works with social service and community agencies to address underlying issues, providing employment assistance, counselling or childcare referrals.

MSF said it works closely with FSCs and HDB branches in each town to identify and support those at risk.

Its spokesman said: “As we strive to provide support to the needy in our community, we are also mindful that some prefer to be self-reliant and decline assistance.”

Homeless seeking rental flat: Half of applicants successful, says MSF

Those who were unsuccessful had other housing options, such as owning or being able to afford a flat, or having family support, said Parliamentary Secretary for Social and Family Development Muhammad Faishal Ibrahim.

  • Posted 01 Mar 2016 15:45

SINGAPORE: The Ministry for Social and Family Development (MSF) provided support and shelter to 543 homeless individuals and 374 homeless families between 2013 and 2015, Parliamentary Secretary for Social and Family Development Muhammad Faishal Ibrahim told Parliament on Tuesday (Mar 1).

Of these, some sold their flat due to debt or divorce, or could not continue staying with their families because of strained relationships or behavioural issues, he noted. Many first approach close relatives or friends to take them in, or rent from the open market, for a few days or up to several months.

Of the cases assisted by MSF, about half applied for a rental flat, of which about half were successful, he told Parliament.

Those who were unsuccessful mostly had other housing options when they applied, such as being able to afford a flat or having family support. Some already owned a flat. MSF, the Housing and Development Board and social service agencies work together to assist these individuals and families to explore alternative housing options, Dr Faishal said.

He added that HDB recognises that families with young children and elderly dependants may have greater needs, and considers their circumstances and exercises flexibility on a case-by-case basis.

“For some families and individuals who have no other place to stay, MSF works with social service agencies to identify temporary shelter options while they find other accommodation. We also address their other needs, which may include counselling, financial assistance, employment and other factors that contribute to their housing instability,” Dr Faishal said.

Government and community agencies such as Social Service Offices, Family Service Centres, and HDB Branches in each town also coordinate identification and support for individuals and families who may be at risk of homelessness, he added. Families which are facing mortgage arrears, for example, may receive a combination of financial help, emotional support, and guidance.

Responding to a question from MP Muhamad Faisal Abdul Manap, Dr Faishal said he was unable to give a projection of the homelessness trend over the next five years, but he gave the assurance that the Ministry will “continue to work closely with HDB and community partners to provide assistance to homeless families and individuals and to help them to regain stability”.

Meeting the Challenges: The Future of the Family in Singapore

At Singapore Polytechnic’s Experience 2016, a Special Innovation Project by Singapore Polytechnic, FFL Council Member, Anita Fam shares as the Keynote Speaker about the social and demographic trends that are changing the face of the family in Singapore and the need to take action in order to meet and overcome these challenges.

By Anita Fam

Singaporean families are changing and they are changing much faster than we might have imagined. The combined drivers of shrinking family sizes, an aging population and other social and demographic factors means that we need to prepare ourselves for a shift in how we think about supporting the family unit both in terms of resources as well as focus.

How Are Our Families Changing?

Families Are Getting Smaller

There are now fewer people in an average Singapore household. Between 2013 and 2014, the average household size fell from 3.47 to 3.43 and this trend is likely to continue in the future. Not only are our families getting smaller, but what comprises of a typical family in Singapore is also changing.

In the past, a typical household unit would have seen 2 parents and several children. In 2014, for the first time, the percentage of families with this profile fell below 50%. This means that the traditional nuclear family is now in the minority. Instead, the majority of households in Singapore are now made up of married couples without children, married couples living apart from their children and one-person households. The number of married couples without children or living apart from their children has increased from 3% to 14% between 2000 and 2014. The number of single person household has in the same period of time crossed over the 10% mark and is now at 11.2%. In addition to these numbers, the number of divorces is slowly increasing. Again, this has consequences for single person households and single parent households. Taken together, all these numbers are large and significant.

Clearly, we now live in times where the definition of what comprises of a household unit and what that means about how families live together, share their lives, and depend on each other is changing.

Families are Getting Older

You’ve probably heard this said many times over the past few years, but Singapore’s population is ageing. With one of the world’s highest levels of life expectancy, Singaporeans born in 2000 can now look forward to living until 82 years of age. If you had been born in 1970, your life expectancy would have been just 66 years of age.

What this means to the family unit however is, that families are getting older. Not only are our households getting smaller because we have fewer children, but the average age of our families is being pushed up as we live longer. In the past, family portraits would have featured a few elderly members of the family surrounded by many young adults and children. Family portraits of the future will probably start to show the opposite – a few children surrounded by many senior and elderly family members.

Families Will See Their Resources Stretched

Older families also mean that each family will have fewer resources. With fewer young people in the family, there will in future be fewer working adults in each family to support ever increasing numbers of retired and elderly family members.

A look at some statistics will make this point easier to understand. In 1970, there were 13.5 working citizens supporting every elderly citizen. That means that the support of each elderly citizen could be shared across almost 14 working adults. Today, that ratio has fallen to 4.8 working citizens to each elderly citizen. By 2030, we can expect the ratio to have fallen even lower so that there will only be 2 working adults to support each elderly citizen.

If you think about it, that means that the resources that each working adult needs to set aside to support our elderly population will need to be 7 times more than what they would have needed in 1970; and we are not even factoring in the impact of rising healthcare, housing and other costs which have occurred in our society.

What Can We Do?

On the surface, it seems that these changes are overwhelming. However, there are many things which we can as a society start to do in order to meet and overcome these challenges.

Acknowledge the Importance of the Extended Family

Whilst the nuclear family unit might be getting smaller, the extended family unit is still an important part of our society. Singapore is lucky because we are a nation which recognises the role and importance of the extended family. So, families don’t need to comprise of just parents and children. They are made up of maternal and paternal grandparents, in-laws, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles, cousins, nephews and nieces.

So the very first step to addressing our future challenges is to recognise and acknowledge the importance of our extended families. Think about how we can create greater bonds within the extended family, be prepared to help beyond your immediate family units. By working across the extended family unit today, you prepare future generations to accept and adopt this model of support, care and love.

Prepare for Marriage

Getting married, starting a family, these are all important life changing events. In families of the future, the responsibility that each parent and spouse will need to take on will increase. Not only in terms of caring for your own children, but becoming jointly responsible for the care of your parents and your in-laws.

The better prepared you can be for marriage, the higher your chances of being able to build and grow a strong and lasting family unit yourself. So, take the time to go through a marriage preparation course before you get married. The stronger your relationship and the better prepared you are, the happier your marriage will be.

Make Time

It is true, the demands of work and the high cost of living and the expectations which most young couples have today mean that many of us spend incredible amounts of time and energy building our careers.

But this shouldn’t come at the cost of family time. Singaporeans recognise this too. FFL’s family time polled revealed that only 55% of us are satisfied with the amount of quality time we spend with our families.

Families need to become more intentional about setting aside “family time” to bond with each other. We need to make this as much a priority as possible.

Use Technology

Whilst technology has often been cited as a barrier to family time and communication, like most tools, it can be used to create more platforms for us to connect with our families too. Using WhatsApp family groups and other types of social media within a family group can enable us to stay in touch with each other despite our hectic lifestyles.

source from Families For Life

Monthly Housing Clinic

Difficulties in selling, purchasing or renting a house? Facing housing issues? Need an advise? Do register for our housing clinic!

The housing clinic is all about housing issue faced by client either in terms of selling, purchasing,renting or looking for a house, they are consider a suitable candidate for this platform.

This platform serves as an enlightenment, perhaps a better housing option or a clearer solution to their current housing issues. However, we do not do any housing appeal on client’s behalf unless we open the case on our end.

There is no criteria at all, although it is targeted to low income, any persons from all walks of life are welcomed, as long as they’ve any issues or legal issues, they can register for our Housing Clinic.

Housing Clinic will be available on appointment basis. You could send in a referral to us and we will follow up with an appointment date and time for your client accordingly. Please find referral form (Housing Clinic) on our referral tab.

Our housing clinic will be held on every 2nd and 4th Saturday of each month. All of the services provided will be held at the main office : Block 3 Queens Road #01-169 Singapore (260003).

We hope that the supports available could be fully utilized and let’s hope that this small steps will make a big change to clients’ lives.

For any queries, you can call us at 6471 5447 or email Ms Syazwani at syazwani@justparenting.org.sg

Thank you.

A Quick Summary – Budget 2016

Click picture to enlarge

GST Voucher — Cash Payments for 2016

Earlier this week, Singapore’s finance minister Mr Heng Swee Keat carried the traditional black briefcase and stepped up to the parliament podium today to make his first ever budget speech. His budget that puts forward government financial policy between 1st April 2016 – March 31st 2017 was strongly focused on the economy. Here’s a quick summary of what he put forth:

FOR HOUSEHOLDS IN GENERAL

  • GST VOUCHERS OF $250/$500 will be issued for all Singaporeans aged 21 and above . If you Annual Value of Home falls below $13,000 congratulations you’ll be getting $500 this year, otherwise you’ll be getting $250.
  • HDB SERVICE AND CONSERVANCY CHARGES REBATES OF BETWEEN 1 – 3 MONTHS will be made available to all HDB households.
  • PERSONAL INCOME TAX RELIEVED WILL BE CAPPED at $80,000 per year starting from YA2018.

 

FOR FAMILIES WITH YOUNG CHILDREN

  • A NEW CDA ACCOUNT CALLED THE FIRST STEP ACCOUNT was announced, parents of children born from 24th March onwards will receive $3,000 in their CDA. Dollar for dollar matching from the government up to co-savings cap will remain.
  • CLAIMABLE MEDISAVE FOR PRE-DELIVERY MEDICAL EXPENSES WILL DOUBLE
  • A NEW PILOT INITIATIVE CALLED KIDSTART will draw government and community resources to help needy children under the ages of 6 to receive support
  • A FRESH START HOUSING SCHEME WILL PROVIDE RENTAL HOUSING ASSISTANCE for families with children, to qualify, parents must stay employed and ensure that their young kids keep going to school.
  • OUTDOOR ADVENTURE EDUCATION will be expanded for all students through a new master plan, with a new outward bound campus to be built on Coney island, set to launch by 2020.

 

ON EMPLOYMENT AND EMPLOYABILITY

  • SKILLSFUTURE WHICH IS A PART OF THE GOVERNMENTS LONG TERM GAME PLAN will now include SkillsFuture Study Awards to develop specialist skills in 12 sectors for early to mid-career Singaporeans regardless of qualifications
  • WAGE SUPPORT SCHEMES WILL BE IMPLEMENTED to help those who face greater difficulty in finding jobs
    • A TECH SKILLS ACCELERATOR WILL BE SET UP TO Identify specific skills in demand in the ICT sector and assist Singaporeans to develop skill standards and certification in this field. They will also work with anchor employers who have agreed to hire based on skills not certification

FOR LOW INCOME FAMILIES

ENHANCEMENTS WILL BE INTRODUCTED TO THE WORKFARE INCOME SUPPLEMENT (WIS) SCHEME WIS will be paid every month instead of quarterly at present. The qualifying income ceiling will also be raised to $2,000/mth

 

FOR SENIORS

  • THE SILVER SUPPORT SCHEME WILL BE LAUNCHED IN JULY 2016. It will benefit the bottom 20% of seniors, who will receive payouts of $300-$750/quarter. The first payout will be a double payout including a back-payment for the 2nd quarter of 2016. There will be no need to apply for the scheme, and 140,000 seniors are expected to benefit.
  • A PILOT SCHEME WILL BE LAUNCHED TO BUILD COMMUNITY NETWORKS FOR SENIORS. This will bring together schools, VWOs, seniors with a team of full time officers to provide co-ordinated health and social support.

OTHERS

    • A NEW AREA CALLED THE JURONG INNOVATION DISTRICT WILL BE LAUNCHED that will create an innovative urban environment to house different activities within a single next gen industrial district. The area will house R&D, protoyping labs, advanced manufacturing and robotics. It will also function as a living lab with testing and development of future technology such as self-driving cars.  The first phase is expected to be completed by 2020
    • PIC CASH PAYOUTS WILL FALL FROM 60% TO 40% on expenditures on or after 1st August 2016, PIC will expire after YA 2018, indicating that there will be no extension for the scheme. Tax deductions under the scheme will remain the same

How Much GST Credits You’ll Be Getting?

 

The bigger question on most Singaporeans’ minds is how much will they be getting this year, $250/ $500? Well first off, you need to have had an assessable income of $26,000 or less in YA 2015.

If you meet that condition, the answer is pretty simple, if you live in a HDB flat , odds are you should be getting $500 – This of course, depends on where you stay. If you live in a condominium, apartment or landed property, you’ll probably be getting $250 this year.

How can you find out exactly how much you’ll be getting from GST Credits this year?
2016’s GST Credits are based on the Annual Value of your home. If you’re a homeowner, all you need to do to check that value to is login to  mytax.iras.gov.sg.

The value of your home will be available there at no cost. If you are not the homeowner and want to avoid an awkward conversation with your parents about how much their house is worth, you can simple go to E-Val and find out. Though you’ll have to pay $2.50 to do so.

To find out more about the annual value of your home visit IRAS here.

 

What are your thoughts on the Budget 2016? Comment them below!

New 5 Cs’ that will actually make you a happy Singaporean

Credit To http://www.raviphilemon.net for the photo.

Pedestrians walk down a street in downtown financial district in Singapore on January 29, 2013. (AFP photo)
I’m sure that many of you readers out there believe the number one way to become a happier Singaporean is to vote for the correct political party in 2016.

Regardless of your political views, this article isn’t about politics or about what the government can do to make you happy.

It’s about what you can do to make yourself happy.

Let me start by asking you a few questions:

Are you unhappy about your job?
Are you dissatisfied with the public transportation system?
Are you frustrated by the high cost of living?
You probably answered “yes” to at least one of those questions.

It seems like we have plenty of reasons to be unhappy. According to this recent report, we’re the unhappiest people in the world.

(We’re even more unhappy than people living in Iraq and Afghanistan. I find that unbelievable!)

Many people think they’ll be happy when they have the 5 C’s: cash, car, credit card, condominium, and country club.

The new 5 Cs that we should all be chasing after

But, on their own, these 5 Cs won’t bring you long-term happiness.

I’d like to introduce you to the 5 Cs that will:

1. Compare less

The more we compare ourselves with others, the unhappier we become. There will always be someone who is:

  • Smarter than you
  • Richer than you
  • Luckier than you
  • Better-looking than you
  • More popular than you
  • More charismatic than you
  • More accomplished than you

You don’t benefit from comparing yourself with these people. The only person you should compare yourself with is you.

Are you wiser than you were a year ago? Kinder? More generous? More courageous?

If your answer is “no”, then it’s time to reflect and to commit to making real changes in your life.

2. Cherish what you have

Every expert on happiness will tell you that grateful people are happy people.

Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky, in her book The How of Happiness, describes from a scientific perspective why counting your blessings makes you happier.

Following Dr. Lyubomirsky’s advice, we should write down at least one thing we’re grateful for every day. That’s sure to make us happier.

By expressing gratitude, we’re not denying that some things in life aren’t ideal. We’re simply acknowledging that, in many ways, we’re blessed.

We can all become happier by making a conscious effort to cherish what we have: family, friends, religious freedom, food to eat, a safe country to live in.

3. Choose your attitude

I’ve heard a saying that goes, “Your attitude determines your altitude.”

Cheesy but true? I think so.

You can’t always choose your circumstances, but you can always choose your attitude.

Your boss gave you a difficult assignment? You can either see it as a problem or as a challenging opportunity.

Your project didn’t get off to a good start? You can either see it as a stumbling block or as a stepping-stone to future success.

Attitude is a choice, just like happiness is a choice.

4. Complain less

Complain—it’s something we all do. But whenever we complain, without also proposing an alternative, we’re being irresponsible.

Some people believe that it’s the citizens’ job to complain and the government’s job to provide solutions.

But this isn’t the right attitude. As a responsible citizen, if we oppose government policy, then we should also take the initiative to suggest a viable solution.

When we’re whining, nobody’s winning. So let’s complain less.

5. Change your circumstances and yourself

When things don’t go your way, it’s easy to feel frustrated, helpless or confused.

Any time you feel this way, ask yourself:

“What is one thing I can do right now to improve the situation?”

This is an empowering question, because it makes you realize that there’s always something productive you can do.

Always.

You just need to focus on the one action you can take immediately.

If you’re unhappy about your relationship with your boss, schedule a conversation with him or her.

If you’re unhappy about your salary, improve your skills, enroll in a course, find a mentor, or negotiate a pay increase. You could even start a business on the side.

There’s an endless list of things you could do to make your life better. If you’re not willing to do anything on that list, then you shouldn’t complain.

Instead of complaining, take action.

In closing…

Happiness isn’t just an emotion. It’s a choice—a daily one.

Finding real happiness takes dedication and determination, so it’s not for the fainthearted.

It’s time to embrace the new 5 Cs.

It’s time to build a happier life and a happier Singapore.

It’s time to get to work.

Daniel Wong is the bestselling author of “The Happy Student: 5 Steps to Academic Fulfillment and Success”. He offers The Exam Excellence (TEE) Mentoring Programme to help students to find exam success, while discovering new purpose in their journey of education. He writes regularly at www.daniel-wong.com. Download his FREE e-book,“The Unhappiness Manifesto: Do You Make These 150 Mistakes In The Pursuit Of Happiness?”, here. Download his other FREE e-book, “Singapore Scholarship Guide: The $500,000 Decision”, here.

Keeping gaming addiction at bay

Gaming Addiction

The telltale signs are disturbing—teens hide in rooms or internet cafes, neglecting friends and even food, while grades and social skills suffer.

The culprit? It’s not alcohol or drugs, but computer games. And addiction to these games is much more common than many people think—a recent study by Singapore’s Ministry of Education and the Media Development Authority found that nearly 9% of young people in Singapore are “pathological gamers” who play around 37.5 hours each week.

While playing an occasional game is harmless, in these extreme cases it can interfere with day-to-day routines such as working or eating. Addicts’ social skills are likely to be weaker and they can also suffer from hand and wrist pain, insufficient sleep and problems at school.

Citing a recent example, Mr Nicholas Khoo, Chairman of Singapore Cybersports & Online Gaming Association (SCOGA), explains how he worked with a 12-year-old girl who had been away from school for more than 6 months and spent most of her time playing computer games at the

Internet café, frequently running away from home. Besides talking to her about taking care of her parents after they have retired, they spent time together playing her favourite game to help wean off her gaming addiction.

“She opened up to us readily and we managed to observe deeper issues such as problems with her brother and relationship issues with her friends in school, and highlighted them to her counsellors. They worked on those issues and informed us that she volunteered to go back to school a couple of weeks after,” Mr Khoo said.

He recommends that parents take the opportunity to engage their children instead of banning internet usage. For example, parents can try to understand the games that their children play, or set limits and monitor Internet usage by placing the computer in the living room.

“Besides reminding them of their real world priorities and helping them work out a time management plan, try to find out if there are deeper issues like peer-related problems, which are causing them to escape into their online world. When necessary, get professional help,” says Mr Khoo.

Counselling centres such as Touch and Fei Yue Community Services have treatment programmes to help youths who are hooked on computer games. With guidance from counsellors, youths can work together with their family to address gaming addiction and other emotional issues.

 

source:  http://www.mda.gov.sg/NewsAndEvents/Newsletters/2011/7/Pages/02.aspx

10 Commandments of Good Parenting

1. What you do matters. “This is one of the most important principles,” . “What you do makes a difference. Your kids are watching you. Don’t just react on the spur of the moment. Ask yourself, ‘What do I want to accomplish, and is this likely to produce that result?’”

2. You cannot be too loving. “It is simply not possible to spoil a child with love,” he writes. “What we often think of as the product of spoiling a child is never the result of showing a child too much love. It is usually the consequence of giving a child things in place of love — things like leniency, lowered expectations, or material possessions.”

3. Be involved in your child’s life. “Being an involved parent takes time and is hard work, and it often means rethinking and rearranging your priorities. It frequently means sacrificing what you want to do for what your child needs to do. Be there mentally as well as physically.”

Being involved does not mean doing a child’s homework — or reading it over or correcting it. “Homework is a tool for teachers to know whether the child is learning or not,” Steinberg tells WebMD. “If you do the homework, you’re not letting the teacher know what the child is learning.”

4. Adapt your parenting to fit your child. Keep pace with your child’s development. Your child is growing up. Consider how age is affecting the child’s behavior.

“The same drive for independence that is making your three-year-old say ‘no’ all the time is what’s motivating him to be toilet trained,” writes Steinberg. “The same intellectual growth spurt that is making your 13-year-old curious and inquisitive in the classroom also is making her argumentative at the dinner table.”

For example: An eighth grader is easily distracted, irritable. His grades in school are suffering. He’s argumentative. Should parents push him more, or should they be understanding so his self-esteem doesn’t suffer?

“With a 13-year-old, the problem could be a number of things,” Steinberg says. “He may be depressed. He could be getting too little sleep. Is he staying up too late? It could be he simply needs some help in structuring time to allow time for studying. He may have a learning problem. Pushing him to do better is not the answer. The problem needs to be diagnosed by a professional.”

5. Establish and set rules. “If you don’t manage your child’s behavior when he is young, he will have a hard time learning how to manage himself when he is older and you aren’t around. Any time of the day or night, you should always be able to answer these three questions: Where is my child? Who is with my child? What is my child doing? The rules your child has learned from you are going to shape the rules he applies to himself.”

“But you can’t micromanage your child,” Steinberg tells WebMD. “Once they’re in middle school, you need let the child do their own homework, make their own choices, and not intervene.”

6. Foster your child’s independence. “Setting limits helps your child develop a sense of self-control. Encouraging independence helps her develop a sense of self-direction. To be successful in life, she’s going to need both.”

It is normal for children to push for autonomy, says Steinberg. “Many parents mistakenly equate their child’s independence with rebelliousness or disobedience. Children push for independence because it is part of human nature to want to feel in control rather than to feel controlled by someone else.”

7. Be consistent. “If your rules vary from day to day in an unpredictable fashion or if you enforce them only intermittently, your child’s misbehavior is your fault, not his. Your most important disciplinary tool is consistency. Identify your non-negotiables. The more your authority is based on wisdom and not on power, the less your child will challenge it.”

Many parents have problems being consistent, Steinberg tells WebMD. “When parents aren’t consistent, children get confused. You have to force yourself to be more consistent.”

8. Avoid harsh discipline. Parents should never hit a child, under any circumstances. “Children who are spanked, hit, or slapped are more prone to fighting with other children,” he writes. “They are more likely to be bullies and more likely to use aggression to solve disputes with others.”

“There is a lot of evidence that spanking causes aggression in children, which can lead to relationship problems with other kids,” Steinberg tells WebMD. “There are many other ways to discipline a child, including ‘time out,’ which work better and do not involve aggression.”

9. Explain your rules and decisions. “Good parents have expectations they want their child to live up to,” he writes. “Generally, parents overexplain to young children and underexplain to adolescents. What is obvious to you may not be evident to a 12-year-old. He doesn’t have the priorities, judgment or experience that you have.”

An example: A 6-year-old is very active and very smart — but blurts out answers in class, doesn’t give other kids a chance, and talks too much in class. His teacher needs to address the child behavior problem. He needs to talk to the child about it, says Steinberg. “Parents might want to meet with the teacher and develop a joint strategy. That child needs to learn to give other children a chance to answer questions.”

10. Treat your child with respect. “The best way to get respectful treatment from your child is to treat him respectfully,” Steinberg writes. “You should give your child the same courtesies you would give to anyone else. Speak to him politely. Respect his opinion. Pay attention when he is speaking to you. Treat him kindly. Try to please him when you can. Children treat others the way their parents treat them. Your relationship with your child is the foundation for her relationships with others.”

For example, if your child is a picky eater: “I personally don’t think parents should make a big deal about eating,” Steinberg tells WebMD. “Children develop food preferences. They often go through them in stages. You don’t want turn mealtimes into unpleasant occasions. Just don’t make the mistake of substituting unhealthy foods. If you don’t keep junk food in the house, they won’t eat it.”

 

Likewise, the checkout line tantrum can be avoided, says Natale. “Children respond very well to structure. You can’t go shopping without preparing them for it. Tell them, ‘We will be there 45 minutes. Mommy needs to buy this. Show them the list. If you don’t prepare them, they will get bored, tired, upset by the crowds of people.”

“Parents forget to consider the child, to respect the child,” Natale tells WebMD. “You work on your relationships with other adults, your friendships, your marriage, dating. But what about your relationship with your child? If you have a good relationship, and you’re really in tune with your child, that’s what really matters. Then none of this will be an issue.”

 

source: http://www.webmd.com/parenting/features/10-commandments-good-parenting